Hi. If you dislike cursing or offensive terms, please just leave the journal right now, otherwise any offense anyone may take will not be my fault -- this IS your warning right now.
For easier explanations, scenarios, and for the heck of the fun, I will be using
(Michelle ) myself
as characters to set examples since I know they love it when I make fun of them. THE SITUATION
First of all I'm not going to point out any individuals but it really bothers me by the fact how seriously weak and feeble people can be when it comes to someone disliking them. First of all, let's say Bobby dislikes me. Idk why, maybe because it's the way I look, smell, draw, talk, whatever. He just dislikes me. Well. I feel really bothered about it. But I shouldn't? Why? Because it's BOBBY'S problem, not mine. The only reason I would be hurt by it would be because I'm insecure and everyone, EVERYONE, no matter how modest or humble you may be or how many times you express how imperfections can be so great -- is aiming to be perfect. It's just an honest fact about life and it's just the way people are. Now, BOBBY HAS THE RIGHT to dislike me, anyone has a right to dislike or like something or someone. He also has the right to express it, but it's often considered mean and probably rude. For both of our best interests, it's best if he keeps it to himself for the fact that he dislikes me. HOW IT WAS HANDLED
BUT LET'S JUST SAY THAT HE TOLD IKM HOW MUCH HE DISLIKED ME;; -GASP-. And then Ikm told me, "Hey Michelle, Bobby hates you."
I ALSO have the right to be upset -- anyone is allowed to feel whatever they want depending on how it affects them. Now all that's left is how I decide to handle it. Ideally, the mature way would be to just leave it alone, ok, Bobby dislikes me, allow me to go waddle away in despair. HOWEVER, I decide to go tell Ikm, "Hey Ikm, go tell Bobby he's an @$$H0L3, he's the most despicable person I've ever met." And NOT ONLY do I tell Ikm, but I tell THE WORLD HOW MUCH BOBBY IS A FREAKIN @$$H0L3!!! Now everyone knows who Bobby is and everyone knows what his personal thoughts are. Now... allow us to analyze the problem. LET'S ANALYZE THE PROBLEM
The REAL "bully" of this situation is me. Michelle is the bully, why? Because I (Michelle), allowed the negative opinions get to me, hurt Bobby, and allowed it to get out of hand. Yes I DO have the right to feel upset and hurt that Bobby hates me. I DO have the right to announce it to the world, but that's not the way it SHOULD be. I not only hurt Bobby by announcing what he did, but I'm also disrespecting myself. If I had respect for myself, I would just suck it up and move on. NOT EVERYONE I'M GOING TO MEET IN LIFE WILL LIKE ME -- AND NOT EVERYONE IN LIFE IS GOING TO LIKE YOU. People overly fantasize a perfect society where everyone is nice to everyone, but that's not how life works, and you will definitely never become strong without having to face any pain. But I'm not the ONLY one at fault. Bobby and Ikm do too. Bobby should never have had told Ikm how much he disliked me and Ikm should have never passed it on to me. It's FINE if you have OPINIONS about someone. It is also FINE if you VOICE that opinion as long as you don't point out the person individually because it's rude and causes exactly these types of issues. EXCEPTIONS / OTHER CASES
However. There ARE SOME EXCEPTIONS. If I posted a DRAWING. ONLINE. IN PUBLIC. And Bobby says, "Wow, this is the ugliest piece of shit I've ever seen." Does he have the right to think that? YES. Does he have the right to say that? YES. OMG. BUT. BUT. WHY?? Because if I post something in public, if ANYONE. posts. something. in. public. ANYONE CAN SEE IT. And ANYONE CAN SAY SOMETHING ABOUT IT. If I post something online where people can see, I'm literally ASKING for people to look at it, and people ARE allowed to voice their opinions about something that is public. But Bobby probably was too harsh about it and could have been more constructive about what he thought. However, he still has the right to say whatever he likes although insults are often looked down upon. THE MEANINGFUL MESSAGE I ALWAYS PUT AT THE END OF RANTS TO MAKE IT ALL TOUCHY FEELY AND CORNY
That is my rant. I'm basically saying -- We ALL have the right to feel things and think things and we all have the right to express it. It really all depends on HOW you express it and how MATURELY you want to express it. Not everyone in the world will agree with you and love you, that's just life and you're going to have to struggle to get through it. I'm sure we've all been in a situation similar to this one before and we've all handled it the wrong way once. However, I hope everyone learns from their mistakes because it's never too late to change for the better.